Why do things have to be so dam complicated? it seems the older you get the harder things are, i swear i feel like its never going to get better, or maybe im just never going to be better! im tired of writing the same thing about how i feel i want to one day write something good! but i cant because nothing is never good! So im looking at old pictures of myself, of my friends and old times, and im thinking why cant things be the way they were before, and it sucks and hurts to know that they never will be! with my friendships, with my family, with myself! i'll never be the same. I always ask myself why I always have issues with friends and why they always hurt me? and i guess i just have to face that it has to be me, its like they drop like flies and all this time im blaming them, when it has to be me! I hate the person that I am! the person that is staring at me in the mirror! I could probably vanish from the face of the earth and noone would even care!