SEPTEMBER 30, 03
AT LEASTE ONCE IN YOUR LIFE I THINK EVERYONE WILL MEET SOMEONE THAT WILL MAKE AN IMPACT ON THEM WETHER ITS ABOUT THERE PHILOSOPHY ON LIFE OR JUST HOW THEY SEE THE WORLD, IVE HAD TWO PEOPLE AS OF RECENTLY, WHEN I WAS IN JUNIOR HIGH I MET THIS PERSON, DANIEL I USED TO LOOK UP TO HIM BECAUSE I LOVED THE WAY HE LOOKED AT LIFE HE HAD NO CARES IN THE WORLD, I WANTED SO MUCH TO BE JUST LIKE HIM, I STARTED TO TALK LIKE HIM, SEE THINGS THE WAY HE DID, AND ITS STRANGE BUT I KNOW WE ARE ALL ON THIS EARTH FOR EACHOTHER, WERE ALL HERE FOR A PURPOSE. HE TAUGHT ME THINGS, AND HOPEFULY ONE DAY SOMEONE WILL SEE THAT ABOUT ME. WELL I HAD MY EVALUATION YESTURDAY AT WORK AND MY SUPERVISOR GAVE ME A GOOD ONE EVERYTHING ON IT WAS GOOD. THE ONLY THING HE HAD TO SAY WAS THAT I NEED TO BE MORE AGGRESSIVE, BE MORE ASSERTIVE, AND TAKE CHARGE! AND THAT GOT US INTO THIS WHOLE BIG THING ON LIFE, I TOLD HIM WELL THAT’S A PROBLEM I HAVE IN EVERYDAY LIFE AS MUCH AS I WANT TO BE MORE AGGRESSIVE I CANT AND ITS NOT THAT IM SCARED BUT ITS NOT ME TO GO OFF ON SOMEONE. IM TOO DAM NICE. SO WE STARTED TALKING ABOUT STUFF AND HE WANTS TO BE A FAMILY COUNSLOR IN A RELIGIOUS PERSPECTIVE,THATS COOL SO ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER I WAS TELLING HIM MY WHOLE LIFE STORY AND HE WAS TELLING ME HIS, AND IT WAS STRANGE I NEVER THOUGHT HED SEE THINGS THE SAME WAY I DO, WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON AND I REALLY LEARNED ALOT FROM HIM I KNOW I HAVE SERIOUS ISSUES AND HE MADE ME THINK A LOT ABOUT MY LIFE AND WERE IM HEADED, MY SELF CONCIOUS PROBLEM, YEH I HAVE A SELF CONTIOUS PROBLEM I DON’T LIKE MYSELF VERY MUCH, I DON’T LIKE THE WAY I LOOK, AM EVERYTHING! AND I KNOW I WANT TO CHANGE BUT, IVE BEEN FELLING THIS WAY FOR SO LONG THAT IT’S THE ONLY WAY I KNOW, I HAVE NO WILL POWER TO DO IT. SO IT OPENED MY EYES AND MADE ME SEE THAT LIFE GOES BY SO FAST I DON’T WANT TO LOOK BACK ON TODAY AND THINK WHY DID I WAIT OR WHAT WAS I THINKING? SO IM TRYING TO TURN MY LIFE AROUND AND HELP MYSELF BEFORE I DECIDE TO HELP ANYONE ELSE. WE’LL SEE HOW THAT GOES….OH YEH IM GETTING A PROMOTION COOL HUH?