So everyday on my way home I see the same man sitting on a bench in front of the library, I think he must be homeless because he always has a bunch of bags in his hands and he's real dirty looking, so on my way home yesturday I thought to myself, god I bitch about everything all the time my job, the things I dont have and I probabley have so much more than he does, im happy with the things I got I really am, I never thought id actually make it this far in life, as fucked up as I used to be! and why do people have to hate on you when you try to make something out of yourself, saying you think your better than everybody else! I never think im better than anybody else, if people really new me they would know that, I am the most self contious person ever. I hate everything about myself, The way I look, act, am. But this poor man he probabley wishes he had the things I have and all we do is bitch about it I need to look into myself more, and be happy with what I have people take things for granted all the time, I just dont understand people that are so materialistic, oh I gotta have Tommy Hillfiger, and Guess and Abercrombie and Fitch, and I have to shop at Macy's. I dont get it, does material wealth make us who we are? cuz if it did I'd be k-mart. Shit yeh I admit it I shop at K-Mart who cares so I buy 3 for one panties. And buy my shoes at the flea market yeh so. I dont know we live in America and we have so many rights and so many privilages, but yet we still dont get it. I suppose Im gonna have to get used to being were I am right now, and accept that I will (unforetuntely) never be famous, and as much as it hurts, i'll live. All I want out of this life is make a difference I dont know how, when, or where but if I die tommarrow knowing that I made a difference in at leaste on persons life id die a happy person. So until than I guess i'll just be.........