Well I just got back from Las Vegas after all the drama that has been happening around here I so needed to get away, the stupid pictures from the b party got out and into the wrong hands and it was just drama I know it wasn't my fault but I felt responsible for everything that happened I wish I wouldn't had thrown that stupid party, my friends got written up and Rosa got fired well it was other things that she had done too. But it was just too much and after all that she wasn't even thankful for shit that I did, ANYWAYS I was kinda feeling like I didn't want to go at first I was like oh god were gone have to hang out with them and I have to hear her bitchin but actually we didn't even hang out at all, the only time we spent together was just the day of the wedding and that was it actually all of us pretty much dud our own thing, Even Jorge and them and it was cool we got to do our own thing it was like we were on the vacation by ourselves. But we had fun me and mark partied like crazy I swear when we got back I couldn't even get back into reality I felt like I was still out of it. Well nobody wanted to do anything they sucked I swear they didn't wanna drink or anything I don't know why they were trying to be all innocent, I was like I don't care im in Vegas fuck it im gonna have fun and we did, We went partying on Friday and it was a different experience ive never tried it to hip hop at first it was kinda sorry but it was fun , everybody was on it, it was wierd and than it was funny because there were these 2 gay guys cute might I add trying to hit on my man, they were all trying to dance with him I was like hey. It was funny I swear there were nothing but guys no girls, and they were cute too. but oh well after we just went club hopping to Hard rock, and then some club called Drais it was cool they were playing good music but it was to bright in there so by that time my high was going down, so we were getting tired and we headed back to the hotel about 5, the day of the wedding we were running late and we were tired as hell it went by fast 15 minutes, then the reception it was cool we were supposed to all go out but again noone wanted to do shit, I couldnt even get them to drink I was like fuck it im gona go sit at the 5cent slots and pretend im playing and get some free drinks and we did, so we were getting drunk and after a while I was like seeya losers, they wanted to go back to the hotel allready, so we left and walked around it was cool. Well get this it was Playboys 50 anniversary and they were having like this big party all weekend so Friday we went to go check it out one of the playmates were selling her paintings and the only way to get into the party was to buy a pix or be vip so while I was pretending to buy one distracting the guy pretending I was rich, it was funny, Mark stole 2 tickets so we were being crazy. So the party was on saturday and we totally forgot about it I was so frusrtated with trying to get them to do something we forgot on sunday I remembered man we could have partied w/ Hugh Hefner Kid Rock was there a bunch of people so that sucked I was so mad at myself I did get to meet some of the playmates and get signatures that was cool, they were kinda plain they werent like really beutiful or anything. Man I wouldve died if I would have met Hugh Hefner I love him. So over all we had fun by ourselves next time I go there I have to make sure and go with people that like to party no more boring people. I don't know I swear I want to move so bad I hate it here so bad I come back to work and im like fuck same thing over again I don't know me and Mark I think are different from other couples we have to much life in us still I don't think we belong here I know were meant for bigger and better things, we want to do things w/ our life I do I hate it here so much I want to move but im scared and I know Mark would want too. i don't know theres just too much holding me back. What do I do? live my life for me or for others? This was strange we were walking down the strip late one night and this was after noone wanted to do anything I was upset and this lady comes out of nowhere and she comes up to me out of everybody, and sez can I give you a free reading and I was like well I don't have any money, she was like its ok and she told me that I look too much into the bad side of things to see the good things in life it was wierd it was like God reached down and talked to me I don't know it was wierd. So anyways I had fun and now im back here agian things are supposed to change but we'll see hopefully they will for the better im getting tired of the same bull stuff! haha well ok I have so much shit to do so back to work I go....